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The Art Of Self-Awareness For Coaches – A 5-Part Series Part 4 – Are We Navigating Authentically?

“…always remember that teaching is an act of service; and to not feel elevated, but rather to be humbled by the ripening of our own awakening…” ― Dr. Barbara De Angelis

In this fourth installment of our transformative 5-part series, I invite you to embark on a profound journey of introspection and Self-inquiry. 

Building upon the insights gained from the previous installments, titled "Is my story of becoming a coach current?", "Am I open to admitting where I am?", and "Are we here to create dependence?", we now turn our attention further inward, exploring the intricate tapestry of our relationship with coaching from the inside out.

Beyond the surface-level allure of financial success and the desire to escape the confines of a 9-to-5 job, lies a deeper realm of the psyche, where the true essence of coaching resides. It is here, in the depths of our being, that we uncover the artistry of guiding others and the profound impact it can have on our own virtuous growth. 

So, join us as we navigate the labyrinth of our inner world, unraveling the threads that connect us to the transformative power of coaching.

Posted on Aug 11, 2023


Authenticity – What If You’ve Had It The Other Way Around All Along?

Authenticity, the buzzword of the century, seems to be on everyone's lips. But why has this concept attracted so much attention?

This article delves into the psychological factors that have contributed to this widespread fascination.

We have a tendency to seek a fleeting expression of an authentic self, cherry-picking and arranging our self-image to meet our own judgments. What if being true to oneself means recognizing the vast realm of the unknown?

Ultimately, life is about embracing the ever-changing nature of existence, rather than fixating on self-importance and clinging to a limited perception of who we think we are.

By acknowledging that all is you, and all is not you, we can break free from the confines of selective self-identification and discover the entirety of our being. 

In embracing this perspective, we can foster a more compassionate and genuinely connected world for ourselves and others, one that profoundly embodies authenticity at its core.

Posted on Aug 2, 2023


The Art Of Self-Awareness For Coaches – A 5-Part Series – 3 – Are We Here To Create Dependence?

Are what we perceive as our needs something we identify as potentially enriching to our human experience, or something whose absence would threaten our sense of safety? 


When did the transition between enjoyable to dependable happen? 

 As much of our preference and perceived “free will” is rooted in the unconscious, a true sense of freedom is thus potentiated through bringing conscious awareness to our imprinted thoughts and feelings that lie beneath our behavior, and most importantly, to the underlying perceived unmet need.  

In the first two articles of this 5-part series “Is my story of becoming a coach current?” and “Am I open to admitting where I am?”, we questioned the positions from which we engage in the act of coaching, and the subconscious and unconscious identifying forces behind them.  

In this third part, we dive deeper into leveraging our experience of coaching as a stepping stone for Self-enquiry.  

Posted on Apr 19, 2023


The Art Of Self-Awareness For Coaches – A 5-Part Series: 2 ‒ Am I Open To Admitting Where I Am?

"Why and how did you become a coach?" – a hallmark question that many coaches would answer with a habitual narration of an "at effect" story, often times one of resilience and recovery from the ordeals of life. 


How aware are we that we are unaware?


Life coaching — is it about people’s need to be coached, or a coach’s need to be coaching? In the first article of this 5-part series “Is my story of becoming a coach current?”, we confronted our tendency to adhere to one single story, based on a conceptualized version of self we identified with at a particular point. 

In this second article, we continue the journey to discover the nature of conditioning and choices.


Posted on Feb 07, 2023

The Art Of Self-Awareness For Coaches – A 5-Part Series: 1‒Is My Story Of Becoming A Coach Current?

“Why/How did you become a coach?” is probably the most frequently asked question for coaches. 

Are we constantly identified with the same previously available explanation for a current situation?

Life Coaching — Is it about people’s need to be coached, or a coach’s need to be coaching? The life coaching and counselling industry has been exploding in the last decade. Through my engagement in this field as a strategic interventionist, I am often called to contemplate and observe my relationship with the nature of coaching itself. Self-awareness is imperative for cultivating a space for virtuous co-creation with integrity and growth at a deeper level.


Posted on Sep 22, 2022 


A Portal Into Self-Awareness – Recognizing The Personal Nature Of Perception

Does how much you like somebody vary depending on whether the version of them at that moment conveniences the version of you you’d like to identify with at that moment? 

We are all in this messy and paradoxical constellation together, each holding onto some subjective concepts, some objective emotionally charged impressions, some personal truth, some objective truth based on past associations; some holding onto surrendering, some surrendering to holding on… 

"How can our relationship with our smartphones teach us about our relationship with ourselves and others? How often do you pick up your smartphone on average per day? 25 times? 175 times? Do you have a friendly relationship with your phone? Does it depend on whether the phone is being a bearer of good or bad news at that particular moment? If your answer is yes for the second question, does it then change your answer for the first question? Wait for it…"

Posted on Aug 1, 2022 

How I Became A Life Coach ‒ Coincidence Or Guidance? Is Coaching All About “Healing”?

Our experience of life can be complicated until it can be not. It can be one with millions of decisions leading to another decision at any point in time, or one with millions of decisions leading to the letting go of resistance to guided intuitions.

Get curious with the gift of your sense of resistance, it offers more wisdom and cosmic comfort than all perceived conveniences combined.

It was 4:00 in the morning. I was still sitting at McDonald’s hogging a quiet spot next to a plug socket, determined to aimlessly watch stand-up comedy specials on my laptop till my next flight in three hours.

After all it was finally the Christmas season, I could not be more ready to take a break and see my folks after a week-long conference in Germany and plentiful sleep deprivation halfway through grad school......

Posted on May 29, 2022

Mirror, Mirror On The Wall, Who Is The Barest Of Them All?

“Projection is one of the commonest psychic phenomena…Everything that is unconscious in ourselves we discover in our neighbour, and we treat him accordingly…. Not that these others are wholly without blame, for even the worst projection is at least hung on a hook, perhaps a very small one, but still a hook offered by the other person.” ― Carl Jung 

What we see in others often serves as a reflection of our relationship with ourselves ‒ the way we connect with others starts with connectedness within.

Let’s suspend any resistance and skepticism for a moment, and be open to the idea that, given the same life experiences, past conditioning, core values, level of consciousness, we would all do exactly the same as another.

To be more specific, what if our tendency to externalize our source of discomfort is the cause AND result of emotions that have been repressed, suppressed and avoided? And the resistance to look within is putting us at a default state of heightened involuntary reactivity? Hence more vulnerable to the temptations of separateness and further externalization? ........

Posted on Apr 14, 2022

From Self-Love To Self-Love ‒ A Journey Of Self-Transformation

Self-love: inheritance or birthright? 

With a deep appreciation for the combinative approach of neurolinguistic, psychological, and spiritual inter-disciplines, I have co-created with people all over the world in the last decade to transform into more self-awareness, sense of purpose and inner freedom. Along the path of transcendence into self-realization, one theme that we always wind up with no matter the challenge, from trauma to relationships to business building, is “self-love”. 

Love is a state of Being. Your love is not outside; it is deep within you. You can never lose it, and it cannot leave you. It is not dependent on some other body, some external form.” ― Eckhart Tolle


We are often told that love, or love for oneself, is an intrinsic capacity, both innate and inherited; it does not depend on any external circumstances or personal traits. Why, then, do we feel that “self-love” is so hard to attain? We are not looking for rainbow and unicorn, but a default felt a sense of joy and contentment. Why the cross-cultural, cross-gender, cross-age struggle? ........


Posted on Mar 11, 2022

Photo by Silvia Li Photography

“Self”-love does not rely on "otherness"

“When I stopped believing in opposites, I see myself in all.”

“Love is a state of Being. Your love is not outside; it is deep within you. You can never lose it, and it cannot leave you. It is not dependent on some other body, some external form.” Eckhart Tolle
So much of so called self-love is around a sense of separation with others nowadays. The Source and our inner being never see otherness in others. A true sense of peace and wellbeing does not require us to guard ourselves from others who we perceive, from their temporary expression, as “weakness” or “toxicity”, which we also sometimes unconsciously show. Judgement and separation is fear-based, it leads to “punishment” in some forms where “help” is instead needed. If we can see the alignment rather than the misalignment between ourselves in others, we see a harmonic world.
People cross paths in the “self-love” ideation often have had our fair bit of sufferings due to external circumstances. Let’s take things simply, humbly and lovingly. To let go of suffering is to let go of the need to be identified with the consequences we associate with certain events that life entails, to let go of our need for victimhood, to be open to recognize an expiry date to what we no longer need to re-activate in our vibrations.
“When I stopped believing in opposites, I see myself in all.” Most of us are socialized to compulsively conceptualize others’ behaviors, as soon as they come into our awareness, as this and that. Our sensitivity to life is compromised when we are constantly feeding our egoic mind’s need to categorize something or someone’s action as good or bad; we miss the essence of our vision outside our predetermined knee-jerk reactions to situations and events – we miss the beauty of beingnesses as they are, independent of their relationship to solely ourselves.
It is easy to see the wrongdoings of others especially when we feel pain. I am simply inviting you all to suspend your disbelief for a moment, and be open to the idea that, given the same past conditioning, life experiences, values, level of consciousness, we would all have done exactly the same as another.
Remember, what we see in others often reflect nothing but our relationship with ourselves. Connection with others starts with connectedness with us.

Posted on Nov 16, 2019 


Photo by Silvia Li Photography

Change is natural

"You invented nothing" is a helpful reminder for an ongoing return to flexibility and sensitivity to life.

Everything we know and do is picked up from someone and somewhere else, in order to socialize and be socialized, to condition and re-condition, to learn and unlearn. There is no such thing as “my” rituals “my” ways “my” life.
Take a fresh breath and re-tune every once in a while, update our system and model of the world, pick up a more aligned set of doings and, most importantly, beings, along the way. Synchrony revives.

Posted on Nov 16, 2019 


Photo by Silvia Li Photography

Life is a dance when we decide to discover the extraordinary in the ordinariness

Adversity isn't an obstacle that we need to get around in order to resume living our life, it's part of our life. Life happens for us, not to us.

Life is a dance when we decide to discover the extraordinary in the ordinariness of it.
Authenticity has always been the most important part of my identity – since the day I decided to move to another country 14 years ago – for growth, exploration and inspiration. And of course, behind the rainbow and unicorn, I also gave up everything including a half-completed PhD degree, for a love that did not blossom. I was left with emotional and physical scars in a foreign land.
Life doesn’t happen TO you, it happens FOR you. Adversity isn’t an obstacle that we need to get around in order to resume living our life, it’s part of our life.
Tony Robbins was the first teacher for me, first time in a while I was reminded to nurture my emotional and physical wellness. Not through his big teeth, but thousands of hours of his audio tape programs, books, seminars, while I was walking, eating, and doing experiments in the lab. After a decade of growing through other life strategists and spiritual teachers (e.g. Eckhart Tolle), I was trained in a few RMT coaching courses that aim at dissolving limiting beliefs and creating lasting changes. Ultimately, I realized my mission of helping myself has transcended into serving others – a true sense of joy and fulfillment.
Now my work has helped people all over the world to transform into purpose, from bringing peaceful presence to individuals who had been through sexual assaults, to losing weight, to creating small business for migrants who were expecting a newborn. As for myself, finished a phD for my passion in neuroscience, became a professional violin instructor and dance performer, loving and serving my tribe of amazing people.
Most of all, I’m genuinely dedicated to contributing to your authenticity and aliveness, overcoming your self-defeating mindsets, unleash your potential to grow and become the creator of your circumstances. Together, we can co-create, cultivate, nourish and live in our beautiful state of peace and passion.

Posted on Oct 03, 2016 

Photo by Silvia Li Photography

What are transformations and breakthroughs?

If you listen to your soul, you will hear a peaceful presence where infinite creativity lives. Awaken your inner potential, live your authentic self.

Unity and oneness is not defined or potentiated by the lack of diversity, or fear of differences, it is an innate place of raw peace and creation that we spontaneously return to; when ego shies away, openness and love shines.
Ever wondered how much more there could be to life? What is holding us back from enjoying more fulfillment and joy? What is blocking us from connecting deeply with people we truly care about? What is your fear with going after your dreams? It is healthy to be honest with yourself and see there is a gap – it gives us the drive to grow and to feel alive, to expand as human being. The whole concept of a breakthrough is – how do we close the gap between “where I am” and “where I want to be”? This applies to any area of your life – relationships, health, life mission, emotional wellness, spirituality, finances, parenting, etc. 

Transformation happens when you are aware of this internally, create from a place of abundance, and allow the expansion of this energy to the universe.
Let’s journey though the paths to inner freedom, meaning and happiness through creating profound transformation and breakthroughs. One could achieve the kind of transcendent connection with the infinite oneness that is within all of us, then we can connect with each other in a different way, and collectively we can have a different kind of power.

Posted on Sep 17, 2016 

Photo by Silvia Li Photography